Let me set the scene here at the snow chalet... It's truly winter which, historically, does not fill me with joy and euphoria. I have chronicled that enough here on this blog, I believe, so I will not belabor the issue at the moment. We are looking down the barrel of the fifth day out of school due to wintry conditions and a full week of 24/7 family togetherness and/or forced interaction. Wahoo! I was super-optimistic today and feeling all virtuous and capable after simultaneously teaching/parenting for the last few days. I was cocky. Winter can't get me down! I can relish the sledding and the snow fort building. Look how happy my kids are. Life is fantastic! I felt sure that the kids would be going back to school tomorrow. We had just gotten through two classes and lunch at the college cafeteria and a family dentist appointment without incident. I was thinking of starting my own business life-coaching single parents through the snow day blues. I was visualizing graciously and humbly accepting my award for "Excellence in Handling Life Under Challenging Circumstances" - you know - at my next Awesome People Conference.
And, then I got the text.
Washington County schools will be closed tomorrow.
Apparently, dear reader, 5 consecutive days of school closings is my emotional breaking point. You might remember the dark days of February 2015? TWO FULL WEEKS. But, let us not speak of that.
I immediately crawled into bed and just whimpered for about 20 minutes. My kids just laughed at me, which is really the wise response to such circumstances. Let's take a little break and add this gem of truth:
OK, now that we've established that little nugget, let me explain how proud I am about turning this emotional Titanic around before it hit the iceberg. After my 20 minutes of wallowing, I got out of bed, splashed some water on my face, and told the kids that we were getting out of the house because Mama needed something fun. We went out to eat for the first time in days and days and days. I had a yummy avocado sub and a cup of tortilla soup. We went to Target, land of retail therapy. I bought a scented candle and a candle holder with hearts all over it. Because Valentine's Day! Love! Cute little hearts! Delicious smells! And, my daughter got a box full of foam heart stickers. My son got a Star Wars book. We got nothing of any use or necessity. It was delightful.
I am now sitting at home, where the candle is glowing brightly and it looks like Valentine's Day has thrown up all over my living room floor because of the sticker detritus. I am wearing diamond earrings that my dad got my mom (made from her engagement ring and my grandmother's engagement ring) because they are pretty, and I just felt like it. When I finish blogging, I'll continue coloring a sheet with a floral embellished inspirational quote. I am laughing at the horrible people who are on House Hunters (HGTV). The man so clearly doesn't respect his wife and she clearly wants to have children and he doesn't and he makes fun of how she should learn how to wash dishes while he admits that she cooks for him all the time. And, he carries around a little chihuahua in a Baby Bjorn, which really solidifies for me his absolute depravity and lameness. Perspective: It may be winter and it may be hard for me to juggle all the things on my own, but I am NOT EMOTIONALLY BOUND TO A CONDESCENDING, PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE HIPSTER WHO WEARS HIS CHIHUAHUAS IN BABY CARRIERS. Sure, they have have their 2000 square feet of turnkey modern condo living, but that home will become the third circle of hell in about a year. My emotional radar is almost supernaturally accurate when it comes to others' relationships. These folks are almost too easy to read.
Clearly, humour is saving me from myself today. I would be remiss, dear reader, if I didn't also share this nugget of exquisite goodness from McSweeney's with you today:
My favorites (so hard to pick!):
A Smidge of Self-Awareness Would Not Go Amiss Face
Your Unquestioned Assumptions are Astonishing Face
Your Premise Could Not Possibly Be More Flawed Face
No Jane Austen is Not Just for Women You Idiot Face
Your Smugness Reveals More Insecurities Than I Care to Count Face
.........
These just keep making me chuckle. I feel like I have had a return of much-needed snarkiness in the midst of my mid-winter despair. Now, I can be a little more earnest and share some more inspiring thoughts in the form of pithy internet quotes:
I am embracing my goofiness and heartfelt-ness. I spend too much time hiding it. :)
This one gets to me. I know it's a little cheesy and goofy, but it gets to me. I aspire to being a "warrior of the light." My troubles are nothing compared to others. But, it's no use trying to compare. Every one has their own pain and suffering. Life is full of suffering, but it is also full of love and light and beauty and gorgeosity (totally made that up). I continue to want to acknowledge and feel compassion for the dark, but I want to choose to live in the light.
Here's a moment of light. Tonight, my daughter was admiring the quilt that her grandmother had made for her bed. She asked me to look at the tiny quilted hearts that were in each of the squares and said "Grandma really worked hard on these hearts. I'm kind of crafty and creative like her. And, her first name is my middle name. We have a lot in common." Sniff. Love.
All right, my earnestness is tapped out for now.
I am assuming the You Really Think 5 Days of No School is Going to Get Me Down? Face.
Thanks for reading.
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