Dear Reader,

Get ready for the pictures in this one!    Let's get today's stats out of the way:

Pounds lost - 30 lbs.  (still)
Total Calories consumed:  1375
Total Calories burned:  315 (50 minutes on the treadmill - I'm increasing my time here)

Breakfast - par usual - the egg crisis has passed:

Lunch  - look at that spinach!:

Dinner (photobombed by my son's hand - my kids are now asking me if I'm going to post my food pics on my blog):

OK, two things about this past week/weekend before I go further....I have had, dear reader, a serious worry hanging out in my head for over a year.   It has been a worry about something that I had very little control over.   So, I pushed it away into the dark recesses of my mind and let it occasionally pop out, but generally tried to suppress it.   It was a little like the vague outline of a metaphorical sword hanging over my head.   Well, I received some news last week that allowed me to get rid of the worry (at least for the foreseeable future).   Whew.   A relief.   So, I'm feeling a bit more expansive than usual these days.  And, Saturday, I have to say was just about as perfect a day as a person could have. I went recital dress shopping with two lovely friends.  Here's the dress that was my second choice:

I will admit to liking some things about what I look like here.  I love the neckline of this dress.  I like the way my waist nips in a bit.   But, I still don't like the way my arms look.   One of my overall goals throughout this process is to eventually become confidently sleeveless.  I like the way my arms are becoming more defined, but I still have a long way to go before I really like the way I look (and I mean that I have a long way to go, emotionally/psychologically).  But, let's focus on the positives, shall we?   The dress that I chose is TWO SIZES smaller than the size that I thought I would need.   TWO SIZES.   I actually had to confirm it with a friend.   TWO SIZES, y'all. It is a size that I haven't worn for a while.   Like maybe since grad school?   I don't want to publicize the dress before the recital, but here are the shoes that I bought to go with the dress - I'm thinking some electric blue nail polish will round this out:

Anyway, the dress that I bought was the first dress that I tried on - KISMET.  I have noticed, dear reader, that I am taking more pleasure in clothes lately.  And, I am wearing more jewelry - especially necklaces.   I am never, by any stretch of the imagination, going to be a fashionista, but I am starting to see clothes as a way to express myself, rather than a way to hide myself.  This is a pretty big deal for me.   

So, I bought the dress and the shoes.  I then bought some sparkly earrings and a sparkly necklace that matched very well.   And, then I had Thai food, including this:

Which rather inspired me to solve my mediocre salad problem in this way this week:

Salad in a spring roll with mint.  Brilliant.  I love occasionally going to high end natural food stores where the most improbable products are on sale - Baked Lentil Chips!  Quinoa Salad with Turkish Figs!!   Artisan Beer Fermented with Lemongrass Stalks!!!   I brought home a few fun items to try out this week.

And, then, of course, I had to go to a bookstore to get something to keep me lightly occupied at bedtime these next couple of weeks:

All in all, just an amazing day.  Spent with two people with whom I feel extraordinarily comfortable. And, the sun was shining.   There should have been an epically joyous soundtrack to go along with this day.   I kept turning to my friends during the day and saying - "can you believe how great this day is?"    And, they agreed.

I don't expect every day to be like that.  In fact, I had a small disappointment at the end of the day which took just a smidgen of the lustre off of the day.   But, to have one of those days every once in a long while is enervating.   Makes me feel as though things are possible.   I think one of the worst feelings in the world is the feeling that there is no possibility opening up in one or other aspect of one's life.   I have felt this several times, luckily not frequently - at the end of a relationship, in a toxic work environment, etc.   I don't like the feeling.   Possibility is my gig now.   The thing that I currently need to work on coming to terms with, I think, is that the possibility that I seek may not be in the direction I expect.   Expectations tend to drag me down.   So, I'm trying to keep a different mantra - Watch and Listen.    Let my life speak - as Parker Palmer would say.

So, that's what I'm going to keep doing.   Watch.   Listen.   Breathe.

It's a good thing I have yoga class tomorrow morning.   Talk about timely.

Here's a little evidence of my sunset chasing to send you off, dear reader:

Thanks for reading!