Dear Reader:

I will admit to being hungry right now as I type this.   I am fantasizing about an open faced turkey sandwich with mashed potatoes and gravy.   Basically a carb fest.   So, I'm going to listen to my body, but not my crazy endorphin enhanced brain (just got off the treadmill) and get myself a handful of grapes.   OK, done.  I have not felt too incredibly deprived since I started this (OK, occasionally....), but the evening is always the worst danger time for me.   I let down my guard and I'm just sitting here at the computer...GAH.

Here are the stats for today:

.9 lb lost since yesterday....

Calories consumed:  1782, plus grapes
Calories burned:  278 - treadmill - 40 minutes
Strength training:  3 sets of upright row, bicep curl, kickbacks (15 each of 8 lb. free weights)

Breakfast:

Lunch (on the go - had to run errands):

Dinner:

Snacks: 4 small slices of cheddar cheese, peanut butter crackers, grapes


One of the things that I am getting used and am not sure that I like, but think is really, really important is stopping and mentally chatting with myself before I eat ANYTHING.   I think this is something that I'm going to have to keep up pretty much for the rest of my life.   Gone are the days of my teens and twenties when I could regularly just eat anything I wanted when I wanted it.   My body is not going to like that at this point.    And, the emotional eating is an addiction which I believe is just like an addiction to alcohol and/or cigarettes, etc.   So, I have to become a really high self-monitoring person.   I want to know what I am doing (and not try to avoid knowing consciously by not thinking about it) with every bite I put in my mouth.   The positive side to this is a better enjoyment of food - savoring each bite.   The difficult side is staying vigilant when I'd like to just numb myself and not think about it.   AWARENESS.  IS.   KEY.   I simply have to pay attention.  And, that requires concentration and energy and vigilance.  

But, I also need to forgive myself if I occasionally stray from the path of vigilance.  This is the quandary.   I don't want to become so obsessive about this that I place too much importance on perfection, and yet if I am not vigilant enough, I may just slide back into old habits and give up.

Happy medium.   Since I tend to be an all-or-nothing kind of personality, this moderation business presents a challenge.   Maybe I could become perfectionist and obsessive about moderation?  What does that look like?   Ha.    Anyway, I feel like I need to go and read some Aristotle about happiness and moderation.   So, I'll see you tomorrow.

Cheers and Thanks for Reading!