Dear Reader:

So, I definitely love Ralph Waldo Emerson.  Ever since reading "Self Reliance" in high school, his essays have had a treasured spot on my shelf.   I was glad to see this quote on Facebook today:

"Do not be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better. What if they be a little coarse, and you may get your coat soiled or torn? What if you do fail, and get fairly rolled in the dirt once or twice? Up again; you shall never be so afraid of a tumble."

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Thanks, RWE.  "The more experiments you make the better."  Yes, yes, yes.   And failure is an essential part of learning and growing.  ESSENTIAL.   So, to pretend that I'm not going to have days where I might eat a little too much or exercise too little is ridiculous.   I will not be perfect.  In fact, I want to be decidedly imperfect here.   But, I will try to start each day with the best of intentions and continue to try and make good individual choices.  And I will be ENOUGH for that day.   

I am in charge of this journey.   I'm not interested in trying a diet plan.   It's not even so much the loss of weight that I'm after, although I'll be glad to see that as a by-product.   I'm trying to find a way of living life that is ultimately more "life-giving" than "death-dealing" (to use a couple of terms that I borrow from the author Parker Palmer).  So, I'm experimenting - especially these first few weeks.   I'm trying to figure out how many calories  I need to eat to feel healthy and energetic and what sorts of techniques I need to use to circumvent my ingrained habits of the mind related to food and stress.    So, I'm going to read a lot and incorporate ideas from lots of friends and family.  But, I do not want advice.   Seriously.   I believe that everyone's journey toward weight loss and health is unique and, while I want to be informed about the science and learn about what works for other people, I will ultimately have to do it my own way.  Feel free to point me towards ideas, though, dear reader!  Just don't tell me what I should do. 

One of the reasons that I really like myfitnesspal.com right now is that it lets you start over EVERY DAY.  It's like the slate is wiped clean.   Each day is sufficient unto itself.   (I just got a little biblical there, didn't I?)  But, if you want to track your overall progress you can.  It's just not omnipresent on your home page reminding you how far you have to go or how far you've come.  

So, stats:

Calories consumed:  1918 (I felt that I needed to add a few more calories today because the last two days felt a little too drastic here at the beginning.  Anyway, this felt much better to me.)
Calories burned:  285 (45 minutes on the treadmill)

According to my scale, which may or may not be accurate:  I'm down 2.7 lbs.   I know that there is usually a big change in the first week or so and then the weight loss slows down, so....  And, yes, I have ordered a new scale (thanks, S.O., for the tip!).

Another big deal today:  I took the kids out for Mexican tonight.   I know, I know.  Mexican restaurants - not the best place for healthy living.  But, I ordered a chalupa, a cheese enchilada, and rice.   And, I ate only about a 1/3 of what was on my plate.   And, I only ate 15 chips.   That, my friends, is revolutionary.   I'm still going to go out to eat some, although I am going to try and reduce the amount of times I do this both for financial and health reasons (tomorrow's post may deal a bit with this and my ambivalent feelings toward cooking).   So, I've got to learn how to incorporate better habits into that setting and today I did.

Here are the daily pics:

Breakfast:  

Lunch:

Dinner:  This is what was LEFT ON MY PLATE when I was finished!!  To be used later in the week.

One note for myself:  Plan snacks on work days better.   I ended up without a snack in the afternoon and really felt the absence.   Not good.

Thanks for reading!